A Love Letter from the Past

I was busy organizing the files in my computer when I stumbled upon a letter from my ex:

J-nine mentioned about this retreat na pinuntahan mo. Alam ko na yung tungkol dun before tayo nagchat. She also said na family, friends and loved ones are asked to write a letter for the person na pumunta ng retreat. And so, I’m making you one. Kasi pasok ako sa category eh. Family, friend, loved one. hehehe. 🙂 Not that I’m assuming and all. 🙂 And so, I’ll start..

“Come up to meet you. Tell you I’m sorry. You don’t know how lovely you are”

The Scientist – Coldplay

So bilang simula, gusto ko magsorry. 1. For not living up to your expectations 2. For being such an insensitive jackass 3. Making you feel like I’ve taken you for granted. Actions may speak louder than words pero promise, it was not my intention. Etong mga nakaraang araw, alam ko struggle ka sa akin. Being my girlfriend was not exactly a walk in the park. It was more like walking over broken glasses. Apologies for the pain I have put you through. I may not understand but nevertheless, I still admit my mistakes. You mean so much to me pero nagkukulang ako sa paalala. Di ko napapakita sa iyo how precious you are and my negligence must stop.

“All of the things that I want to say just aren’t coming out right . I’m tripping on words . You’ve got my head spinning . I don’t know where to go from here” You and Me – Lifehouse

You asked me bakit kita mahal. I can’t give you any concrete answer. All I can say is I do love you. And for that I need you. I may never find my reasons and I may never make you understand why. Pero siguro yun yung sinasabing “leap of faith”. This feeling will always be intangible. An unsloved mystery. Maybe it is meant to be that way. Kasi baka kung may reason ako, baka yung reason na yun ang mahal ko and not you. But that is not the case. Maybe the things you do to me are the reasons why you make me happy but definitely not my reason for loving you. Why I love you? “beats the shit out of me” -the ugly truth. All I know is that I am in love with you Iya.

“It’s not always easy as sometimes life can be deceiving. I’ll tell you one thing, It’s always better when we are together” Better Together – Pareng Jack Johnson

Errr….. No need to elaborate on this one. Life may serve us spoiled food most of the time. But still, eating it with you, makes it one of the best meals I’ll ever have.­

…this is the end of my letter. I don’t know what I should include in this letter so I just assumed that this is a write-whatever-you-want-to-write-to-the-person-in-the-retreat letter. I hope you forgive me for being a pain in your big butt. I’m not letting go. And, YES, I am happy with you. Napakamalas mo at napili mo ko. hahaha! kaya magtiis ka. hehehe. 🙂 “Malas mo, Ikaw ang natipuhan ko.”

OO – Up Dharma Down

It’s always nice to read letters like this. Things may have come to an end, but it’s good to remember moments where someone made you feel special.

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